Rise to Greatness 2021

July 8, 2021 – Charlotte

I walked through the curtain feeling confused and a little disappointed. Not only had I just lost to the World Champion, but I’d been booed by some of the crowd. What had I done to get that reaction? I planted Nicole after the match. She had distracted me. A boop on the nose. I just don’t know enough about her to know what this is. It feels like mind games. A week earlier she had run me down and beat the hell out of me after I defeated Konrad. It was tough to grapple with.

You could tell it was Rise to Greatness season because I stood alone. Everyone was busy, focused on their own journey. I walked off to the side to try and collect my thoughts for a moment before I made my way to the locker rooms. How do you beat someone who changes like the wind? I felt a hand touch my shoulder and quickly turned to see where it was coming from.

Selena: Jordan…

Jordan: Uh… hey?

Selena: I just wanted to say you fought really hard out there. I could tell Nicole got into your head, but… I was still impressed.

I stood there looking at Selena and her wife just behind her. With my hands on my hips, my eyes trailed down to the title hanging from her hand. The World Championship in all its glory. I swallowed hard as I stared at it. My one real shot in December ended in disappointment. The gauntlet had been a proverbial shit show. This was as close as I’d ever come to it.

Selena: I heard what you said about me. It wasn’t something I expected. To know that I inspired someone like you to chase her dreams is… an incredible honor for me to think about. After that match tonight I have no doubt that I’m right when I say you’re going to be the World Champion someday. Your time will definitely come, ok?

I nodded and looked from the title back to Selena. I managed a smile.

Jordan: Thanks, Selena.

Selena: And hey, don’t let Nicole get into your head. Good luck.

Selena gave me a knowing head nod as she and Deanna walked away. Her words made me think. Not about just keeping Nicole out of my head, but getting into hers. I had to think about a way to strike back. To get into her head. I needed to come up with a strategy that wasn’t about me bringing the fight to her, but about luring her in and then making my move.

July 13, 2021 – Los Angeles

With time running out before Rise to Greatness, I looked for every opportunity I could to get some sort of an edge over Nicole. I’d become obsessed with watching her old matches. Trying to understand what made her tick. She was absolutely the most unique person I would ever face. I was days removed from a loss to the World Champ with Nicole providing the head games to help guide me down the wrong path. It’s impossible to understand when I’m fighting this version, or that version. I was booed by members of the crowd for what felt like defending myself. This was a different animal.

I strolled into Living Dangerously Dojo hoping for some guidance on unpredictable opponents. Not that I would actually take the advice, but I just wanted to hear what Dave had to say. Problem was, he didn’t seem to be around. Ever since he hurt his leg in the brawl with Team BDSM, now calling themselves the jackals or hyenas or something fierce, he’d been sort of out of commission. I drew him here once and gave him a lot of shit. Maybe that made it easier for him to avoid me. I spent some time working out alone instead, and watching the trainees run the ropes during class. I was eyeing some weights when someone approached me quickly from the side.

Brittany: What are you doing here?

Jordan: Working out? Am I not allowed to do that?

Brittany: I know you’re not here that innocently. You came looking for Dave, didn’t you?

I sighed and rolled my eyes.

Jordan: What does it matter to you?

Brittany: It doesn’t.

Jordan: Then why are you over here talking to me?

Britt smirked and crossed her arms.

Brittany: Just looking at the lamb before it’s sent for slaughter.

Jordan: What?

Brittany: You heard me. I warned you about what you’re getting into. Nicole is going to tear you apart until there’s nothing left.

Jordan: You’d like that, wouldn’t you?

Britt grinned wider as she shifted all her weight to one side. She was taking some kind of pleasure in this.

Jordan: Do you have some kind of problem with me?

Brittany: You messed with my family. You’re rude to me. You come across as selfish. You don’t listen. I’m just tired of your attitude.

I sat down on the bench behind me and looked up at Britt. I shook my head and sighed.

Jordan: I think you’re confusing me with someone else. If I’ve been rude to you, I’m sorry. I thought it was some kind of playful banter, but I–

Brittany: Save it. I told you when I found out what you were going to do that this was a bad idea. I traveled to Breakdown to warn you. To stop you. What could you possibly gain from this? You have everything to lose.

Jordan: I don’t have anything to lose. I want this. I need this. I need something that’s mine. Everyone is telling me I can’t do this. It’s not even about proving you or anyone else wrong. It’s about proving something to myself. Whether you or anyone else agrees with me, I’ve just been spinning my tires for a long time. This isn’t about being selfish. There’s no title, no glory at the end of this.

I looked down and shook my head.

Jordan: Britt… it’s about overcoming the odds. Not just surviving, but winning.

I looked up and Britt was shaking her head. She let out a sigh of her own.

Brittany: And what if you lose?

Jordan: There’s no what if. I have to win. I have to do absolutely whatever it takes to win. This isn’t a normal match. She’s not a normal opponent. I HAVE to beat her. I don’t know if I can look myself in the mirror if something like this ended in me just watching yet another person celebrate my misery.

Brittany: Damnit…

Jordan: What?

Brittany: I want to hate you. But with passion like this, I have to admit you make it hard.

I laughed softly and stood up.

Jordan: So… any advice since the big guy isn’t here?

Brittany: First, I’m not pulling for you here. Second, never call him the big guy. Third… just stay out of your head. Nicole is already going to be in there, so if you try to play that game with her from the inside, you’re in some serious trouble.

Jordan: Ok… what about the whole multiple personalities thing.

Brittany: You get caught up in trying to play that game and you’ve already lost.

I smiled and nodded to her.

Jordan: Thanks, I… that’s nice advice.

Brittany: It’s all I can really offer.

Jordan: It’s more than I expected. To be honest, I thought you were coming at me because of my tweet yesterday.

Britt narrowed her eyes and stared at me in confusion.

Brittany: Your… tweet?

Jordan: The one to Dawn?

Britt continued to look at me with a blank expression. I got the creeping feeling that I’d just gone too far. Revealed something she didn’t know. Her eyes seemed to study me. Then they suddenly went wide.

Brittany: No!

Jordan: No?

Brittany: No! Stay away from Dawn!

In a moment’s notice, Britt was stomping away. Leaving me standing there in a bit of confusion. I was sure Dawn would be hearing from her and I would be hearing from Dawn. I admit there was a weirdness to the fact that I was dating another one of Britt’s sisters after the way things had gone down between Abi and I. But for me, and I think Abi too, it was all water under the bridge. I’m not sure if we ever had an actual relationship or just a lot of feelings that were heated.

But the more important thing was what Britt had said about Nicole. She was right. So much of this was about mind games. I had to stay in a lane, not play those games, and just bring the fight to her. That was my chance to beat her. Everyone knew I could survive. I needed to thrive. As I turned to leave, I bumped into someone and stood there locked in place as I looked eye-to-eye with Valen.

Valen: Hey, bitch…

Jordan: Valen… I…

She shook her head at me and then smiled. It wasn’t much of a smile, but something was there. Enough to let me know this wouldn’t be like that last encounter between us.

Valen: Don’t worry, not here to punch you. We all know you’re hard enough on yourself. I just… didn’t know if anyone told you everything was good with me. All healed up. No damage. I’ve been back training for the last few weeks.

Jordan: Wow. I’m so happy for you. I thought I had totally messed things up for you. I’ve never forgiven myself for hurting you.

Valen: It was an accident. Not everything is your fault.

Jordan: Heh… it sure felt like it was.

Valen: I’m sure Dave didn’t help that.

Jordan: Your reaction didn’t either.

She laughed and smiled wider. She looked away for a moment and then back at me.

Valen: I saw you looking like an idiot on Breakdown. Crowd acting like you attacked a child. I saw it in your eyes. You were mind fucked, girl. You better not let that happen again.

Jordan: That’s exactly what Britt and I were just talking about.

Valen: That why it looked like she wanted to kill you when she was walking off?

I couldn’t help but smile in reaction as I looked and saw an annoyed Britt running a class of trainees on the other side of the gym. I looked back to Valen.

Jordan: It’s a… well… it’s something else.

Valen: Well, either way. Can’t wait to see what happens at Rise to Greatness.

Jordan: Yeah I’m kind of desperate to make this happen. Not sure I’ve ever wanted to win something so badly.

Valen: Well… don’t screw it up then. Ok?

I laughed and nodded. Valen put a fist out and I bumped it. I watched her as she walked away and entered back into Britt’s class. I folded my arms together and watched for a moment. I remembered back to my own early days. Training wasn’t as much an option. It was trial by fire. Maybe that’s why I was always throwing myself into things. Maybe I needed to grasp control of this situation and show that I could avoid these mind games all together. I didn’t have to play her games or stoop to her level. This was my match. I asked for it. Demanded it. I wanted this win so badly. I needed it. I’ve spent so much of this year being a part of someone else’s story. It’s time to write my own.

July 17, 2021 – Louisiana

I traveled back to Louisiana for a few days to celebrate Bree’s wedding. It was a little surreal. Just a few months earlier, there’s no way I would have been invited. But here I was, plus one with Dawn (that was probably awkward for some people), enjoying the event I never expected to attend. Bree and I’s friendship had reignited like a flame fed a sudden burst of oxygen. It went from non-existent to almost as strong as it had been before we disagreed on Sienna. It didn’t matter. I forgave her first. She did the same second. Now things were fine.

There was still the matter of some issue with Jaina. But it was best if she and I just avoided each other for now. You could tell what she really didn’t like was seeing me with my girlfriend. Dawn and I weren’t exactly shy about being affectionate in public. Laughing, holding hands, the occasional public kiss… I know people had their opinions, but fuck them. For once I was happy. All I wanted for Jaina was to be happy. I hope she would want the same for me.

After the ceremony ended and the festivities began, Dawn and I found our way to the dance floor. Fueled by champagne and the romantic feelings in the air, we practically led the way during all the upbeat music. When the music went slower, Dawn twirled me into her and made me laugh. But then she changed the tone when she grabbed my hands, pulled me in, and started leading the way in a slow dance. I leaned my head on her shoulder and smiled as we moved together slowly.

Dawn: You ever think about this kind of stuff?

Jordan: What? Dancing?

Dawn rolled her eyes as I looked up and at her. She shook her head and laughed softly between us.

Dawn: This. The wedding, marriage… you know…

I swallowed. Not out of nervousness, but to force back some laughter. Of course I’d thought of it. In my head I was a planner. I liked to think about things that were coming. Yeah, I had the spontaneous moment in my career where I just went for something. But outside of it I was a little more calculated. I thought about all the possible outcomes. Even when I was doing something that was wrong like I had with Jaina. I knew it would likely lead to a split, but I did it anyway because in my mind it would lead to something else with Jaina. I was wrong. Often times it was that one thing I didn’t think about that ended up catching me in the end.

Jordan: Babe… you’re asking the girl who got engaged to someone after a few months.

Dawn: That’s true. But, still. Do you think about us this way?

Jordan: Already?

I tried to play it off like I didn’t just recount the answer being yes inside of my head.

Dawn: You yourself just said that you were engaged after a few months.

Jordan: Ugh… fair. Use my own words against me.

Dawn grinned at me and titled her head. The thing about Dawn is she was so good at putting me in a corner and forcing me to act. It was something I liked about her. In a short time I was growing to love it.

Dawn: Maybe don’t make it so easy then?

As the music changed, Dawn forced me out into a twirl and then brought me back in. I was caught off guard and it was obvious.

Jordan: Honestly?

Dawn: Yes, honestly.

Jordan: You’re not going to drop to a knee and propose if you like the answer are you?

Dawn: Stop avoiding the question! It’s not that serious.

Jordan: Really? Because it feels serious.

Dawn: Jordan!

Jordan: Ok!

I looked around the party for a moment as we danced in place. Slowly turning around in a circle in our spot. It was hard to ignore that kind of thought in a room like this. I’m not even sure the last time I’d been to a wedding. Probably back in Chicago. Even then I found myself looking around the room and wondering if certain women were options. The ones I knew were possibilities at least. In front of me now was just one possibility. I looked back at Dawn and smiled and shrugged. I chose honesty.

Jordan: Yes, I’ve thought about it. But, I’m also this stupid hopeless romantic if you haven’t noticed.

Dawn: Well, it’s kind of obvious… yeah. What have you thought about?

Jordan: I’ve dreamed about it. But I’ve probably dreamt about it with everyone I’ve been with. Almost everyone.

Dawn: That makes it feel less special.

Jordan: Come on. You don’t think about the future?

Dawn: Of course I do. But I try to mostly live in the present and not worry so much about the past or the future.

I sighed and shook my head. The mention of living in the present made me think about everything other than her question.

Jordan: Must be nice not over analyzing everything that happened in the past and worrying about everything that MIGHT happen in the future.

Dawn: It’s wonderful. You should try it sometime.

Jordan: Ha!

Dawn tried to dip me, but my resistance almost caused us to slip up. As she tugged me back up we both laughed at each other before going back to dancing.

Dawn: I already knew what you would say before I asked. I just wanted to hear you say it.

Jordan: You wanted me to admit that I want to marry you? Err…

Dawn: Well, when you put it that way… it does sound kind of early…

Jordan: I misspoke.

Dawn: So, you don’t want to marry me.

Jordan: Damnit, Dawn. I mean not right now. I want to have a normal relationship for once.

Dawn: Normal? Am I that boring?

Jordan: Stop trapping me! Damn, you’re good at that.

Dawn grinned as we turned in place.

Dawn: You’re just fun to play with sometimes. I’m sorry. Kind of…

I laughed at her and gave her a playful push, but then pulled her back in and let her go back to leading our dance.

Jordan: The truth is I think a lot about the future. I dream about it, day dream about it… sometimes I just fucking obsess over it. I worry about how things will go. But, yeah, I wonder about where we’ll be in a year. I think about what happens if we’re still together.

Dawn: Again, have you thought about living in the moment?

Jordan: I try to. I do. But…

I let out a sigh as the song continued on. I looked around the party again. Dawn touched my chin and brought me back to looking at her.

Dawn: What is it?

Jordan: When I was a kid… I worried so much. About the cause and effect of everything. I worried about what would happen to me. Even when I left home, I was scared to death about making some mistake that would land me right back in Nebraska. Under her control.

Dawn: Your mom?

I shook my head and closed my eyes.

Jordan: So it’s hard for me sometimes. To not worry about the what ifs. Both from before and what’s to come.

I felt Dawn place her forehead against mine and I opened my eyes. She was smiling.

Dawn: Live in the moment with me. There’s nothing you need to worry about. And next weekend, live in the moment at Rise to Greatness. I promise you it will be worth it. Let yourself do that and you can look back on it with fond memories. Not regrets and what ifs.

Jordan: Dawn… there’s so many unknowns. She’s the most unusual opponent I’ve faced.

Dawn: So what? You know who you are, right? Knowing you is as important if not more important than knowing everything about Nicole. You almost beat the world champ a few weeks ago. But what happened?

Jordan: I got concerned with what Nicole might do.

Dawn: Exactly! So, you know what to do.

I smiled and leaned up to kiss her. Dawn surprised me by dipping me backwards in perfect form. We both had a smile on our faces as we looked at each other. She leaned down and kissed me.

Dawn: Live in the moment…

She pulled me back up and embraced me as the music stopped. Some of the dance floor started to disperse and I grabbed her hand.

Jordan: Let’s grab a drink in this moment, ok?

Dawn laughed at me and rolled her eyes as I tugged her away from the dance floor. She caught up next to me and wrapped an arm around my back. As we walked toward the refreshments, we hit the brakes as someone to our left was about to run into us. That couple did the same and we were all left staring at each other. They were familiar faces for us. Maybe even more so for Dawn, although I didn’t know about all of that until later that night. It was Dave and Regan.

In a living recreation of the duel in The Good, The Bad, and The Ugly, Dawn, Regan, and Dave all stood and traded looks back and forth. It was tense and awkward. But I put an end to it by walking in the middle and making my presence known.

Jordan: Uh… hi there…

Dave: Jordan. Dawn…

I looked back at Dawn. She had a mostly blank expression on her face. Regan said something quietly to Dave and walked off. Dawn leaned into me and whispered.

Dawn: I’ll grab some drinks and head back to the table.

Dawn gave me a kiss and then walked away. After Regan and Dawn departed, I shot Dave a look. He smiled and scratched the back of his head.

Dave: Long story…

Jordan: Yeah? About like the story of why you’re here? I was surprised to see all the Helms’ gathering at this wedding of all places. I thought y’all like… hated each other or something.

Dave: Well… that’s a shorter story. Bree called me and we spoke. I wanted to make sure we supported Dom. Even though it’s complicated, he’s still family. And things can change. You of all people know that.

Jordan: Yeah… when she sent me an invitation a few months ago I almost threw it in the trash. But it made me think. And I thought, forgiveness was easier on the soul than holding on to a grudge.

Dave: Is it?

Jordan: I think so, but I’ll have to get back to you on that. How’s the leg?

Dave shrugged against his crutches and smiled.

Dave: Britt said you showed up at the gym looking for me.

Jordan: Yeah… she gave me some advice in your absence though. It surprised me.

Dave: She also gave me the heads up on something I just saw.

I laughed and shrugged.

Jordan: Should I expect to wake up with a knife in my chest?

Dave: From Britt? She’ll get over it. I’ll admit I was a little surprised. Kath might have something to say to you about this, too.

Jordan: Huh?

Dave: Best to not get into it. Shall we grab a drink at the bar?

Jordan: Ok… sure…

Dave crutched his way toward the outdoor bar and ordered two drinks as I trailed behind him. When I arrived he turned and handed me a drink as he propped himself up on the crutches.

Jordan: Should you even be drinking?

Dave: Don’t try to tell me what I can do!

He looked serious for a moment before he smirked and took a sip. I followed his lead and then leaned against the counter.

Dave: Saw you dancing with Dawn by the way. You two look good together.

Jordan: Uh, thanks?

Dave: I probably shouldn’t even say that with all the weird history you have with my family. But, I feel obliged to point out your bravado considering the history you also have with Bree’s family. To show commitment to someone else when Jaina is right there.

I looked over and saw Jaina speaking with Reece. I rolled my eyes at the sight of him. He pissed me off. I knew things about him that bothered me. Not because I wanted Jaina back. But because he was a dick in my opinion. I looked back at Dave and shrugged.

Jordan: She moved on. I did, too. It doesn’t need to be complicated.

Dave: Even though it is, right?

I sighed and hit my expression with another drink.

Dave: Listen, I’ve seen you around her before. We all know what happened when you were with Kath. So, you and I can both admit that the two of you are like magnets. Drawn in so much you smack into each other as hard as possible. And then, something pulls you apart.

Dave looks over at me. He takes a drink and smiles.

Dave: So even though I know you wanted to talk about Nicole, I just wanted to say something about that. And to say, be careful. I can tell you and Dawn are a good fit. I see that spark between you. The way you talk to each other… be careful. Don’t let yourself go down a path you know will end in pain.

I nodded, both to Dave and to myself. I looked back to our table and saw Dawn sitting with Liz. I turned back to Dave and let out a sigh.

Jordan: Have I already done that? Gone down a path that will only end in pain by challenging Nicole to this match?

Dave: I guess… only you really know the answer to that. Pain? Obviously. You’re in for a world of pain. I saw it’s Underground Rules. Nicole is like a queen in that arena. So in that way you’ve signed up for some serious pain. But I saw the show on Thursday. It looked like you took Britt’s advice to heart.

I nodded and took another sip from my drink as I leaned into the counter.

Dave: Just know… as much as she lit a fire in you at Taking Hold of the Flame. You just lit a fire under her ass on Breakdown.

Jordan: I know.

Dave: Good, because god knows what she’s prepared to do to you in that match next weekend. And you? You have to be prepared to–

Jordan: Do anything?

Dave: Yes. Exactly. Throw out all the rules. Bring the fight. Don’t hold back. I know how much this means to you. I’d love to see you show what you did against me last year. Don’t think I went easy on you in that match just because we shared a flight to the show. You caught me. And you lit a fire in me. So I know exactly how you feel when it comes to this thing with Nicole.

I smiled and let out a soft bit of laughter as I ran my finger along the rim of the glass in my hand.

Jordan: So what you’re saying is, you have me to thank for winning Taking Hold of the Flame in your hometown last year?

Dave: Ha!

Dave rolled his eyes as he brought the glass to his lips.

Dave: No chance I’d give you that much credit.

I rolled my eyes back at him and turned toward the bar, leaning my elbows against the counter. It grew silent for a moment as I stared at the bottle of alcohol shining in the sun behind the bartender.

Jordan: You have no idea how badly I want to win this.

Dave: I think I do.

Jordan: It’s no offense to you, or Lucas, or Peyton, or anyone involved with this thing with Minerva. But I need something that’s mine. Something I do without Cookie or anyone else at my side.

Dave: I know.

Jordan: You do?

Dave: I saw it in your eyes the moment I asked you for help. You couldn’t say no, but Cookie had just told the world she was going to take an extended break from in-ring competition. You looked lost. Like you were waiting for something to come along and show you the right way. Clearly, Nicole did that. And who knows how long this lasts for, but you have to take advantage of it while it’s in front of you.

I nodded and looked over at him. I smiled.

Jordan: It’s just something I have to do.

Dave: Then do it! But don’t do it halfway. Don’t just stand up like you did against Sienna. Don’t steal a win like you did against Syren. Don’t catch her off guard. Beat her. Take control of the match, in her playground, and beat her.

Dave smiled and held his glass up to toast me. I clinked my glass against his and he winked as he turned and started walking back toward where Regan and his son were seated. I looked down at my drink for a moment and closed my eyes as I took a deep breath. Dave was right about what I had to do. No half measures. I had to win this. I had to be standing tall at the end. No matter how much blood, sweat, and tears I had to spill on the mat… there was only one way I could allow this to end. As the clear winner.

July 23, 2021 – Los Angeles

I spent an hour or two at Rise’s fan fest signing autographs and taking pictures with fans until they were shuffled off to those featured matches. I made sure everyone in line got their due and then plopped down in the padded folding chair and sat alone. The more I thought about Sunday, the more anxious I got. Even just sitting there, looking at my phone, I began tapping my foot quickly. The nerves were real. I wanted to get up and watch those matches from afar, but instead I sat there alone. I wanted that moment.

I didn’t even hear when someone approached the table. The 8 by 10 they put on the table in front of me made me jump. It was one of the Psychonauts portraits Cookie and I shot right before our match against Frozen hell. Our first loss together. I placed my hand on the image and slowly looked up.

Cookie: Can I get an autograph?

Standing in front of me was that familiar bosom blonde. The one I called my best friend. I practically leapt over the table at her for a hug the moment I saw who she was. Ethel was here.

Jordan: Holy shit, dude. Why are you here?

Cookie: Come on!? It’s Rise to Greatness! Of course I had to come here.

I pulled her tightly against me and smiled.

Cookie: Question is, what are you doing over here all on your own?

My smile went off my face and the anxiety returned. I leaned back against the table and put my hands against the edge.

Jordan: I’m just thinking about Sunday.

Cookie: Of course you are.

Cookie came and leaned next to me against the table. We watched the distant crowd around the Fan Fest ring.

Cookie: Remember right after you were outcast from Sienna and Bree’s group? When we did that signing at that ice cream place?

Jordan: How could I forget!? Everyone wanted your signature. They practically didn’t know who I was. And I’d JUST won the Adrenaline title a few months before that. It was madness. That little girl that wanted to be like you.

She smiled and looked down for a moment. She was clearly remembering the sweetness of that moment, too. Ethel looked over at me with that smile still on her face.

Cookie: We’ve both come a long way since that moment.

Jordan: Yeah… I suppose…

Cookie: You suppose? We teamed together and we beat Syren and Ravyn. Chris and Lucas. We defeated Frozen Hell!

Jordan: You mean Frozen Glory?

Cookie: What’s the difference?

Jordan: Regan would kill you if she heard that.

Cookie: I ain’t scared of her!

I leaned away from her and smiled as I looked at her. I shot her that ‘oh really’ look and she shrugged in reaction.

Cookie: You have no reason to be so nervous.

Jordan: I don’t know. I’m not so much nervous as just… I want to get in there and just do this. I want to deal with this my way. Everyone has been telling me I need to be careful. I don’t want to be careful. I want to fight. I want the best. I want the challenge.

Cookie: Then what’s the problem?

I shook my head and looked down at our feet.

Jordan: I’ve spent my whole time in this company on the rise. I’m always on the rise. But I’ve never gone to that next level.

Cookie: You have so much to be proud of, you know? Maybe you are at that next level. What if you’re the only one who doesn’t see it that way?

I looked at Cookie for a moment and then scoffed. I smirked and shook my head.

Jordan: That sounds like something Dave would say.

Cookie shrugged and pushed herself off the table. She turned and faced me.

Cookie: Maybe that’s the case? I always felt when we were fighting together that maybe I was holding you back.

Jordan: Stop that. I loved fighting with you.

Cookie: Yeah, but… it tore you up that we didn’t win that tag league. I could tell.

I swallowed and didn’t answer. The way the tag league had finished was the start of a spiral for me. Honestly, I knew it had started when we lost to Frozen Hell. Mentally, it took a long time for me to recover. Cookie to a step to the side and then I continued to spiral. None of that was her fault, of course. It was on me. I lost control. I’d spent the last two months taking control back. But here I was, a few days away from the biggest event of the year, and I was feeling anxious again. The confidence wasn’t shot. This wasn’t like before. There was a lot at stake. I was the one who called my shot here. I asked for the beast to come out of the cage and fight me. Now it was do or die.

Jordan: It’s ancient history, Ethel. Dawn told me a few days ago that I spend too much time thinking about the what ifs of the past.

Cookie: Smart woman. Maybe I was wrong about that being too soon.

Cookie smirked and I laughed. She joined into the laughter. As it trailed off, I went back serious again.

Jordan: She also told me I think too much about the future, yet… here I am.

Cookie: Well, you can’t just not think about the future at all. I know you, Kylie. You have dreams and goals. You’re like…

Jordan: A visionary?

Cookie: I was going to say an astronaut but I kind of like that better.

Jordan: An astronaut?

Cookie: You know… because you like live in the stars!

My eyes went wide as I looked at Cookie in a fit of confusion. She wore a bright smile on her face. She shrugged.

Cookie: Anyways… it’s just fine to think about the future. Just don’t obsess over it.

Jordan: Yeah, Dawn said… live in the moment.

Cookie burst into laughter and looked away.

Jordan: What!?

Cookie: Sorry, it’s just…

Cookie turned back to me and shook her head.

Cookie: It’s really hard to imagine you doing that.

Jordan: Thanks…

I rolled my eyes as Cookie put her arm around me and pulled me close to her. We heard some noise from the ring and saw one of the wrestlers posing for the crowd with a smile on his face. I could see the hope written all over his face. I wondered if I’d lost some of that at some point. If this became something other than my passion. I wanted that passion to return to me. Maybe it slowly was over the last month or so. The finish at Taking Hold of the Flame. That fire lit by Nicole. The win over Konrad. The match with the world champion and the one I looked up to when I was learning the ropes. Maybe it was coming back more than I realized.

Jordan: Do you think I can do this?

Cookie: What? Beat Nicole?

Jordan: Yeah, and all of it. Can I turn this into something more than just losing these big matches?

Cookie: Of course you can. But… maybe try and take this one match at a time. This might be the toughest match you’ve ever had. Nicole is a legend not because of her success, but because of her uniqueness. Many legends have even fallen at her feet because they couldn’t deal with her personality. But you know what? You’re different, too. I’m not sure if there’s anyone else on the roster that’s just like you. Nicole has never faced someone like you. The girl who can’t be killed.

I smirked and looked at Cookie.

Cookie: I saw what you did last week. You took your shot. You’re in her head now. You didn’t play her game the way she wanted to. She’s playing your game now. Just… stay focused. Stay in the moment. And if you can do that, I think you will walk out of Rise to Greatness with a really big win. And then what comes next?

I laughed softly.

Jordan: I don’t care what comes next. I want this first.

Cookie: There’s the spirit. You know… you’re going to have your moment. I know it. You’re too damn good not to. It’s just about timing. Your time WILL come.

Cookie put her pinky out and I wrapped mine around hers. Then I wrapped my arm around her and pulled Cookie in tightly as we watched the crowd take in the match in the distance. This was bound to be the toughest match of my career just in terms of the stakes. A woman I knew very little about. A match where literally anything can happen. Everyone in the world has me labeled as one thing. A survivor. It’s time they learn something else about me. That I’m a winner, too. They can love me or hate me because I’m fighting their beloved crazy girl Nicole, but this is a moment that I’m made for. This woman lit a fire under me when we first locked eyes. Now it’s time for her to see exactly how hot this fire burns. It’s time for me to take a moment for myself, and not be someone else’s.

Promo

A camera shot opens on the floor. A die comes rolling into view and toward the camera. It comes to a stop right in front of the lens and a hand comes into view and picks it up. The shot raises and pulls back as the hand pulls the die up. Jordan Majors is sitting in a chair, leaned forward, shaking a pair of dice in her open hand.

An interesting thing happens when you throw dice. The outcome of what you’ll get is entirely random. Any number from 1 to 6, throw in a second and you get 36 different possibilities. In some way, my match at Rise to Greatness feels like the roll of a die. Nicole Kinneck is like a constantly rolling 4-sided die that can change in a moment’s notice. You can get a normal fight, a defensive foe, a playful one, or the lunatic. Just like…

Jordan snaps.

That.

When I step into the ring with Nicole, or Pro, or Ducky, or Luna… I don’t know which one I’m gonna get. For lesser people, I think this would be tough to deal with. For me? It’s different. You see, I look at this particular challenge and feel more excited. When Nicole entered Taking Hold of the Flame looking for a fight, I was there. I was ready for that. And then I was faced with the reality of how different she is from others I’ve fought. I could have taken a step back or shied away, I could have come into this match scared out of my mind. But I’m not. I’m ecstatic.

Because I’m not worried about the randomness of Nicole. I’m embracing it.

Jordan closes her hand over the dice and folds her hands together.

This is so different from any fight I’ve ever had. But somehow, it feels in my wheelhouse. It feels like the kind of fight I was made for. I’m at a point in my career where I’m tired of being known as the survivor. I don’t want to be just a survivor, I want to survive and overcome. This is my third Rise to Greatness. Each one has presented me with a unique challenge. I beat Ravyn. I stood up to Sienna. This needs to be something different.

When I faced Sienna last year, my head was so full of the possibilities and scenarios that I probably fucked up my chance to beat her. I did beat her, actually. She got herself disqualified. But bleeding and barely able to stand, I said no. I kept going. It opened some eyes, sure, but it wasn’t what I wanted. The truth is I need something that I can call mine. Like I said on Breakdown, I need that defining moment I can point to in my career and say to the world, see what I did there? This is a chance for me to show my full capabilities. This is the right chance and the right opponent for me to really shine.

No matter which Nicole is in that ring, I have to keep bringing the fight and pushing myself. And you can say, just like against Sienna right? But this is different. Sienna played me right into her game. She spun my head sideways. She had me second guessing myself. She caught me looking ahead and focusing on what came before. Maybe I got the last laugh by walking away at Apocalypse while she laid on her back victoriously, but I learned a lot. I know what not to do anymore. What my up and down career has taught me is that you either win or you learn. As cliche as that might sound, it’s rung true for me. I go through stretches of winning and losing. But it’s always after those stretches of losing that I come back stronger than I was before. I just learned a lot when I lost to the World Champion. This match is about to show that.

Jordan smirks and wipes a few strands of hair behind an ear.

This time around I’m not in my head like I was against Sienna. Or like I was after those tough losses in the tag league, gauntlet, and scaffold matches. I’ve not allowed Nicole to be in my head. At this last Breakdown, I’m positive that I got into her head. I changed the game she likes to play, I took control. I don’t care if she’s bringing the fight, the boops, or trying to kill me… I’ll be ready. The mistakes of my past have prepared me for this moment. But I’m not worried about the past. I’m not thinking about what’s coming in the future. I’m focused squarely on what’s directly in front of me. This is a match that I asked for. This is a match that I will do anything to win.

I have to admit, Nicole, that this is your playground. This match is something that you’ve made a living off of. You’re a former Underground Champion. A person known for their violent tendencies. But I’m walking into your yard and pulling the ground right out from under you. I’m not here to play your games. I won’t do this how you want. I’m here to make a statement.

Jordan looks down for a moment and then back up to the camera.

For a long time now I’ve been looking for that one thing. The thing that separates me from the pack. That forces people to see me as more than an afterthought. You already have that, Nicole. No matter which one of your personalities is taking the spotlight in that given time, people know what they’re getting with you. Maybe this can be the moment where everyone finally sees what I have to offer.

Yes, I’ve held gold. I’ve had good little moments here. But I still haven’t reached that defining moment in my career. The one that swings the pendulum the other way. This company is full of people who tell me I’m a future world champ and people who tell me I will never make it. The truth is, what they say means nothing. I have to do something. I have to take that moment for myself and prove that I’m worthy of the praise I get. Or fall flat and fade away.

I have fought and I have scratched, I’ve shed sweat and tears and blood, and I have given this company everything I’ve had to this point. I know I have to give it even more if I want to go further. I have a dream of being a future world champ, but it’s not the only thing that matters to me. I have a lot to prove, and first I have to prove that my career can be defined by more than the roll of a die. I have to show that I am in control. No matter who I get on Sunday, even if it’s all four, I have to prove that I’m better than the madness that surrounds me.

Jordan smirks and then nods to herself.

I know you probably had these big grand plans at a comeback, Nicole. But unfortunately for you, this is about me. I need something that’s mine. This will be mine. You lit the fire and you will not extinguish it. I’ve been told by so many people that you will be unlike anything I’ve ever seen. You know what? Maybe you’ve never seen someone like me. You’ve never seen anyone that survives like me before. You think your personality changes will be too much for me? Look at my career. Things are constantly changing. I adapted then. I evolved. I’ll adapt with you, too. I’ll take everything you’ve got and more and I’ll keep getting up. I will frustrate you beyond your wildest dreams. And then, I will beat you.

This match isn’t the role of a die. This isn’t about luck or destiny.

Jordan rolls the dice out on the floor and looks down at them and smiles.

This is me making a name for myself. It’s about proving that I’m worthy of praise. It’s my time to show the world that I am ready for anything. That I’m more than who they think I am. Some might think there’s nothing on the line here. Nothing for either of us to lose. For me everything is on the line. I HAVE to conquer this challenge. And I will.

So welcome to my moment, Nicole, Pro, Ducky, and Luna. You’re about to find out what so many others have, but this time more than ever before. Jordan Majors is money, baby. You can take that to the bank.

Jordan winks to the camera and blows a kiss. She walks forward and softly kicks the dice away. She smirks as she walks off camera and the video ends.